6 Must-Have Inventions for Ladies of the Future

The votes are in and here’s what you all thought of my last column. Fortunately, the weapon was only a pie, and not a jagged spork. Luckily, someone in this family is doing well; it just happens to not be me. I really need to go out and practice my writing. As promised, this week I am bringing you the top inventions for a future woman, presented in order of use throughout the day. A special thanks to working mothers ED and JW for their valuable input. Ladies, if something bothers you about this list, feel free to blame them.

Read on for the 6 inventions you simply must have!


REMINDER AND NOTIFICATION SYSTEM FOR A PARENT US 2010/0042912 A1

Schedule for Mom

Y'know...a schedule

The sound of the tide rising and failing…a cool breeze on your head…the sun slowly rising…a finger rapidly poking you in the side…”Mommy, mommy, wake up! I need Count Chocula nooowww!!!!”

Good thing you have Remind-A-Mom. Now you can keep track of your precious ray of sunshine’s activities with a simple click of the mouse. Scheduling has never been this easy.

Autonomous mobile robot cleaner system US 2005/0171636 A1

Robot Cleaner

Aww, you're hungry again.

Who wants to spend time cleaning the house when you can have a robot do it? The Robot Cleaner combines the cleaning power of Mr. Sparkle with the robot intelligence of Rosie the Robot. You can just set it, forget it, and then head off to work. Billy Mays would be proud.

Laundry folder and stacker US 4057241 A

Laundry folder

...but can it fold fitted sheets?

Finally you are home after work and picking up the kids from their broad swath of activities. But Jimmy got grass stains on his pants and Mary spilled peanut butter and jelly on her new blouse. Its laundry time. Thankfully the Automatic Laundry Folding Machine finishes up your laundry in no time.

Power driven wine bottle opener US 2007/0193415 A1

Bottle opener

Gets that cork popped with maximum efficiency.

“Ok, the oven is cleaning itself, the autovac’s on dirt patrol, and Maggie’s enjoying her Swing-A-Ma-jig. I can’t believe it. I’ve done all my house work, and it only 7.” Time for a nice glass of wine.

Virtual cosmetic autosurgery via telemedicine US 2002/0064302 A1 & THERAPY DEVICES AND DOMESTIC/COMMERCIAL THERAPY SYSTEM US 2011/0004048 A1

Therapy device

How's your chi doing?

Time for a quick spa treatment, where the massage table works out the kinks, while the cosmetic auto-surgeon injects enough Botox that would make Daryl Hannah proud. Sit back and enjoy the cool sounds while your worries are whisked away.

Automatic toilet seat lowering US 5461734 A

Automatic toilet seat

Automatic, or automagic?

All that wine might require a late night trip to the loo. I think you’re covered.

Next time: Danny takes a lie detector to determine if these patents suggestions were not his own. Either way, he is wrong.

Find previous writings and musings from the off-kilter Danny Rooney here: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10.

Patent Information from Landon IP

This post was contributed by Registered Patent Agent Dan Wolka and edited by Chris Jagalla. The Intellogist blog is provided for free by Intellogist’s parent company, Landon IP, a major provider of patent search, technical translation, and information services.

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7 Responses

  1. [...] has reviewed a good number of interesting patent documents: from the odd to the godly, for both ladies and gentlemen.  But let’s search outside our own borders and venture into exotic locales to [...]

  2. [...] Find previous writings and musings from the off-kilter Danny Rooney here: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11. [...]

  3. [...] and musings from the off-kilter Danny Rooney here: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, [...]

  4. [...] and musings from the off-kilter Danny Rooney here: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, [...]

  5. [...] and musings from the off-kilter Danny Rooney here: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, #12, #13, [...]

  6. [...] and musings from the off-kilter Danny Rooney here: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, #12, #13, #14, [...]

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